me saying all the things you don't wanna hear

check

oh fuck

The kindest you have ever been was on Sunday at 8 in the morning while we cut coke with your birthday card and you said "yeah that's yours, the biggest line, take the biggest line." Coaxing and grape and smooth. I didn't, because I thought if I did, I might die. It looked like an earthworm. Your voice has never been clearer. We laid out, I read a little and then you lifted up my dress to see what kind of underwear I wear wearing, pointing out the rips in my tights. "You look like a whore." I suppressed my smile and I was proud of it. You gave me your pillow, crumbled up a jersey and went to sleep on it. I turned around cold. You put your foot against mine and held it there. I moved mine away, and woke up at noon staring at the back of your forearm the one with the freckle. It looked warm. I got up gave you the comforter and walked the thirty minutes home.